Tips On Potty Training

As a former preschool teacher, I have seen a lot of different method's for potty training. These varied from bribery and pleading, to logic and reasoning, all the way to shame and ridicule. I can attest that right now, the last one does not work. The first two concepts depend entirely on your child and the relationship you have developed with them.

Let's start with when to begin the potty training process. My preschool requires children entering the second year program, that is 3.9 to 5 year-olds, to be toilet trained. But ideally, you need to begin the process before that point. At around 18 to 21 months, you should buy a children's potty, and place it in the bathroom. Allow the child to sit on the toilet clothed or naked. That's all they need to do for the time being. You can allow them to have books or games while they sit.

Next, you need to be watchful for signs of readiness. At the preschool, one of the mom's told me that her child, who was in the first year program and was probably around three and a half at this time, used to wake up with only pee in his diaper. He would then go over to the couch, wedge himself behind it, then squat down and have a bowel movement in his diaper. This was him telling her that he could sense those feelings in his body. So when your child displays behavior like this, or tugging at their diaper after they use it, or tell you that they've peed or pooped, you need to ask if they'd like to go sit on the potty. If they say no, you have to respect that.

The number one rule in potty training is: don't push it. If you make it a negative experience, then you are hurting both yourself and the child. The process of teaching your child to use the toilet can quickly turn into a full fledged nightmare if you are not sensitive to the fact that this whole process is new and scary. Many children are excited to grow up and ‘become a big kid', but there are other's who are more reluctant.

Take ‘Mary'. She was a lovely child at the preschool, in the first year program. She was potty trained by the beginning of the school year, and was doing fine, with just a few accidents here and there. But when she came back to school following winter break, she regressed. She went back to Pull-Ups, and not just during nap time, she was wearing them all day. Pull-Ups are fine for pee accidents, but Mary was big for her age, and her poops could not be contained. Mary was obsessed with babies, and wanted to go back to being one. Her mom was aware of this, and, I think, kept the situation from getting worse by letting Mary go through this stage in her life. By the time Mary entered the second year program, she was back on track.

So once your child agrees to sit on the potty after they have ‘gone', then they are starting to make a connection. They can sit on the potty with their diaper on, and you can even dump the contents of the diaper into the potty to show them how the process is going to work. And then, usually after the age of two, your child will start telling you before they need go pee or poop.

Remember, everyone becomes potty trained eventually, so don't stress about it. It will happen.